Being a mom is a very challenging job. As a mom your days really never end. A mom is on call from the time she opens her eyes until they close at whatever ungodly time that life situations allows her to go to bed. All mothers have demands on their life, however the life of a mother to a child on the autism spectrum can be a gift and a curse at the same time.
Children with autism are very different from other children because they learn differently. A mom with a child on the autism spectrum have to find new ways to teach this child that has a developmental delay that hinders the learning process. The education process is different. If the child is diagnosed through early intervention there is a wealth of services available for them including speech therapy, occupational therapy and ABA skills. These are in home services until the child is school age after the third birthday. Although mothers of children on the spectrum are pleased with the fact that the child is learning it can also be overwhelming to have service providers in the home on a daily basis. It sometime can feel like an intrusion on life.
At three years old a child with autism begins attending school after getting an individualized educational plan also known as an IEP. The mother than has the pleasure of calling schools to check for class availability and then begin to book tours and interviews for schools. This is a lengthy process. At times it requires taking days off from work. Once the child is in school the mother now has to be an advocate to ensure that the child is getting serviced properly.
Children on the autism spectrum are more prone to getting sick. The immune system of a child with a developmental delay is often times not as strong as other children. This can cause a mother with a child on the spectrum to take more trips to the emergency room resulting in May sleepless nights.
Some children with autism have sensory issues. The sensory issues allow them to be very energetic. The children tend to run instead of walking. Children on the spectrum have a tendency to sleep less due to these sensory issues. Their little bodies do not embrace sleep. So now mom has a messy home to clean.
These are all things that I have experienced on my journey being a mother of a child on the autism spectrum. My son who is now three years old was diagnosed with high functioning autism a little after his second birthday. I contacted early intervention because I noticed a speech delay. He is two years old and had a vocabulary of less than ten words.
When the service providers began showing up in the home it felt like my life was under a microscope. I had strangers coming into my home telling me to do things differently. The change was uncomfortable. They wanted me to stop babying my baby and let him learn to be independent. I didn’t realize the severity of his speech delay because he never needed to talk. I was always at his neck and call. I was making it worst because he never had to ask for anything. I always took care of his needs. Now it was time for me to let him learn to do things like a big boy.
When it was time for my baby to go to school I was overwhelmed. My baby was getting on a bus with strangers and would be with strangers for eight hours of the day. I was in fear. My son is nonverbal. My head raced with thoughts. What if someone hits him or mistreats him? How will I ever know? The transition to school was a really big deal for me. I am happy to report that school is great and my baby is learning so much. I see the progress. He is growing up very beautifully and doing such amazing things.
Although my baby is sick from time to time with colds and stomach viruses he is doing well. I am grateful he doe go to the emergency room it is never an over night stay. At this point he doesn’t like taking any kind of medicine. I give him a diet high in iron. He eats lots of fruits and vegetables. This prevents trips to the doctor because he is getting the nutrients that he needs.
My baby is a big ball of energy. He usually wakes up at six o’clock in the morning and is able to stay awake without a nap until at least 10 o’clock at night. He gets into everything and anything. His favorite pastimes are playing in water, going into the refrigerator, and bothering his older sister. My days are busy and my nights long. I am on a journey through life with a tour guide that has autism. I love my tour guide with all of my heart. I wouldn’t trade my life as an autism life for anything in the world.
Written by Regina Alston
