Dear Phife,
As I write you this letter, I’ll be as strong as I can. There’s no other way for me to express how much love I have for you and the Tribe. It all started 2 years ago. Now, I grew up on hip hop, and that includes you guys Tribe too. Y’all music was always dope to me but I became an overnight fan 2 years ago. I was at home on my laptop, on Tumblr just scrolling through my dashboard, reblogging stuff for my blog and it was a picture of you guys, including Jarobi that popped up. Black and white, standing side by side. I reblogged the pic of y’all and said to myself how long it’s been since I’ve actually heard y’all music. It was that moment that started everything for me. I immediately started listening to y’all albums all the way through for the first time and something in me sparked up this feeling I never got before. I even heard your joint “Ventilation: Da LP” and loved it too. After hearing y’all albums all the way through, I found myself watching y’all music videos, researching and looking y’all up, watching interviews, saving photos on my laptop and then I saw the documentary. It was the best shit I’ve ever seen but at the same time, it hurt me to see you and Tip beefing like that. That I don’t feel comfortable with seeing or hearing about. Besides the drama y’all two had, I found myself a die hard fan overnight. Everything about you guys was absolutely moving and inspiring to me. As a hip hop fan whose a singer, I wish to have the same elements in y’all music in mine someday. Y’all taught me politics, self righteousness, being proud of who I am, all at the same time, never changing who I was to be something I’m not and that’s why I love Tribe so much. Fast forward to July 18th, 2015. This was the day I finally got to meet you guys. I found out on Instagram maybe a day or two before and I was so amped and hyped to meet you guys. That was the same day my little cousin was having a birthday party but I missed it because I stood on that line waiting to meet y’all. I remember wearing a purple bucket hat, white t-shirt with a purple one underneath, my ripped Levi Jeans and Grape 5 Air Jordans. I didn’t have anything on me but $15 so I couldn’t buy any merchandise, which was a blow to me but when I finally met you guys, I was excited, scared, stuck, frozen, amazed, there was a rush in my stomach and my heart was beating super fast. Q-Tip told me he liked my style, I’ll never forget that, Jarobi was kinda like he didn’t want to be there but he was cool too, then I met you and told you how hilarious you are on Instagram and you said to me “Thanks my man.” I shook Ali Shaheed’s hand and you guys signed my poster. After that, I returned back to the Bronx with this smile on my face. It felt like I just went through an enlightenment. I had a totally different feeling from that day. Now this is the part of the letter that’s gonna be really hard for me dawg but I gotta tell you how it affected me. The day you left us, it was the same day as my cousin’s 23rd birthday and three days before my 22nd. It was around 10 at night. Someone posted a link in one of the hip hop groups I’m in on Facebook saying that you past. I was confused and automatically got angry. I was angry because I remember years ago, someone spread a rumor that you already did and you appeared on an interview like “Here I am!” waving with this smile on your face in a joking way like you always do. I saw the link was from DJ Chuck Chillout’s Twitter account so I hit the hashtag “RIP Phife Dawg” and my heart started racing. I only saw but 30 posts and I just brushed it off because I was sure you were still here. I went to sleep and ended up popping back up around 5 in the morning. When I pop up out of my sleep, something isn’t right. I grabbed my phone and saw that I got a text message from a friend of mine and the text said in these exact words, “Hey Clone, did you hear about Phife? He died” this was when I knew it was for real. I went to Instagram and immediately, my whole entire feed was flooded with you. I was stuck, confused, hurt, angry, upset, this wasn’t supposed to happen yo. On the morning of March 23rd, I had a dentist appointment that day. Right before I left my house, I finally cried, I finally broke down yo. Me and you just met 8 months before that, you were so cool and down to earth, I felt like a family member was taken from me. I cried for about an hour thinking about you and the rest of Tribe. I was thinking about life, about hip hop and the state that it’s in, all of these things came to my head because you were no longer with us. The entire day, I just remember everything being so slow. Time had stopped but the world kept going. My head was spinning and I was in a slump. That had to be the longest day of my life. 2 days before my birthday which made it even worse. A month later, there was a memorial for you in St. Albans. I skipped classes just to be there for you, I had to be. Right after my math class I left school, hopped on the train at 149th Street-Grand Concourse and was on my way to your hood. It’s a long ass ride to get out there but it was worth it. I met other fans, including my bro Shenron, Ralph McDaniels was out there, I missed the part where they handed out free shirts with your name on it and it was raining and so cold but it was worth it. I don’t think I could’ve been able to handle myself if I didn’t go. The next morning, this dude I went to high school with saw me in the papers honoring you. It made me feel like I was this poster guy for you, for Tribe. It was my name, my picture, your picture underneath it and it said I was honoring YOU. So much love I was receiving from my hip hop peers. I was a proud fan of you dawg, nah fuck that, I AM a proud fan of you. Now, lately, you guys have been on top of the world again and it’s amazing. We Tribe fans always wanted a new album from y’all and y’all did that for us. It was hard but at the same time exciting to hear your voice again. The album is amazing and “We the People” is fucking amazing too. I read about you and Tip being on good terms throughout he making of the album, I knew you guys were. I was hoping you two were. I love y’all brotherhood, we needed y’all back in hip hop again, we needed to see that, to feel that, to know that. Just last week, I went to the pop up shop. I didn’t get the shirt I originally wanted but it was worth it. I just wish the people who worked at the shop wasn’t so selfish to be the ones wearing all the merchandise and tell us fans there’s no more stuff. That pissed me off yo but I’m happy I got something. I’m gonna wear it forever, as well as my custom made t-shirt that my guy Curtis made for me. Yesterday, we finally celebrated the street naming after you. I missed the part where they finally showed the sign but I had to be there once again for you. So much love and good energy was out there for you. I seen your wife too, she’s so strong and beautiful too. I heard about your mom being there too, she’s also so strong and beautiful too. Jarobi was right in front of me but I was too scared to ask for a picture. I froze up. I went back home mad about that but then I remembered the time I met y’all last year. Yo Phife, this letter is to tell you how much I miss you and love you, how much the fans, your family and hip hop misses you. It don’t have to be your birthday, a Tribe Tuesday, a Tribe album anniversary for me to represent, I’m always representing. People remind me everyday how much I put on for hip hop culture and I think about you automatically. When my time comes when I’m in the game best believe you’ll be honored in the best way possible in my own way. I do it everyday but still. Man, Happy Birthday Phife. I love you and miss you again. Rest in beats King. It’s Tribe 4 ever and it’s always you 4 ever! You on point Phife? You always were!